From Stuck to Unstuck: A Coach's Guide to Breaking Through Plateaus
You know the feeling.
You've been working hard. Showing up. Doing the things you're supposed to do. But somehow, nothing is moving forward. You're in the same job, having the same conversations, facing the same problems, feeling the same frustration. It's like you're running on a treadmill—expending energy but going nowhere.
You're stuck.
And the worst part? You can't quite figure out why. On paper, you're doing everything right. But something invisible is holding you back, and the longer it goes on, the more you start to wonder if this is just how life is now.
Let me tell you something: being stuck isn't a permanent state. It's a signal. And once you understand what it's trying to tell you, you can use it as a launching pad for the breakthrough you've been craving.
The Anatomy of Stuck
Before we can get unstuck, we need to understand what "stuck" actually is.
Stuck isn't laziness. It's not a character flaw. It's not evidence that you're not trying hard enough or that you lack discipline.
Stuck is what happens when the strategies that got you here stop working for where you're trying to go. It's the gap between your current reality and your desired reality, combined with a lack of clarity about how to bridge that gap.
Here's what stuck typically looks like:
You're busy but not productive. Your days are full of activity, but when you look back at the week, you can't point to meaningful progress. You're checking boxes, but not moving the needle.
You keep starting and stopping. You begin projects with enthusiasm, then lose momentum within days or weeks. Your life is littered with half-finished endeavours and abandoned goals.
You know what to do but aren't doing it. This is perhaps the most frustrating version of stuck. You have the information, the resources, and the plan. You just can't seem to execute consistently.
You feel like you're waiting for something. Permission, the right time, more clarity, more confidence, more money. There's always a reason why "now" isn't the right moment to make your move.
You're repeating the same patterns. Different day, same problems. Different relationship, same conflicts. Different job, same frustrations. The details change but the core issues remain eerily similar.
If any of these resonate, you're not alone. In my coaching practice, I'd estimate that 80% of new clients describe themselves as "stuck" in one or more areas of their lives.
Why We Get Stuck: The Hidden Causes
Understanding why you're stuck is half the battle. Most people focus on the surface symptoms, but the real causes run deeper. Here are the most common culprits:
1. Outgrown Identity
You're still operating from an old version of yourself. The beliefs, habits, and strategies that served you five years ago are now limiting you, but you haven't consciously updated your self-concept.
Maybe you still see yourself as "not good with money" even though you've been financially responsible for years. Maybe you identify as an introvert who hates networking, which prevents you from pursuing opportunities that require connection. Your identity becomes a cage when it's based on who you were rather than who you're becoming.
2. Unclear or Conflicting Values
You're trying to pursue goals that don't actually align with what you care about. Or worse, you're trying to honour multiple values that directly contradict each other—like valuing both "career achievement" and "work-life balance" without acknowledging the tension between them.
When your goals and values are misaligned, you create internal resistance. Part of you wants to move forward while another part is pumping the brakes. The result? You stay exactly where you are.
3. Fear Disguised as Logic
You've convinced yourself that you're being "realistic" or "responsible," but what's really happening is fear is running the show. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of judgment, fear of change itself.
The tricky part is that fear is smart. It doesn't usually announce itself. Instead, it dresses up as reasonable objections: "This isn't the right time." "I need more experience first." "What if it doesn't work out?" These might sound like wisdom, but they're often just fear wearing a convincing disguise.
4. Decision Fatigue and Analysis Paralysis
You're stuck in research mode, endlessly gathering information and weighing options without ever pulling the trigger. This often comes from a belief that if you just have enough information, the "right" choice will be obvious and risk-free.
Spoiler alert: it won't. At some point, you have to make a decision with imperfect information. Staying stuck in analysis is a way of avoiding the discomfort of commitment and the possibility of being wrong.
5. Lack of Support or Accountability
You're trying to do it alone. You haven't told anyone about your goals, you have no one checking in on your progress, and you have no structure keeping you accountable. In the absence of external support, it's incredibly easy to let yourself off the hook.
6. Burnout or Depletion
Sometimes stuck isn't psychological—it's physiological. You're running on empty. Your body and mind need rest, but instead, you're trying to push through. When you're depleted, even simple actions feel insurmountable.
The Unsticking Process: A Step-by-Step Guide
Now let's get practical. Here's the framework I use with clients to move from stuck to unstuck:
Step 1: Name It Specifically
"I'm stuck" is too vague to work with. Get specific. Where exactly are you stuck?
In your career? Are you stuck at a certain level, in the wrong role, or in the wrong field entirely?
In your relationships? Are you stuck in unhealthy patterns, unable to find connection, or settling for less than you deserve?
In your personal growth? Are you stuck in old habits, unable to make time for yourself, or unclear about who you want to become?
In your health? Are you stuck at a certain weight, unable to maintain habits, or dealing with chronic issues?
Write down exactly where you feel stuck. Be brutally honest. You can't solve a problem you won't fully acknowledge.
Step 2: Identify Your Contribution
This is the hard part, but it's also where your power lies.
How are you participating in your own stuckness? This isn't about blame or shame—it's about ownership. As long as you see yourself as a victim of circumstances, you remain powerless. When you acknowledge your role, you can change it.
Ask yourself:
What am I avoiding?
What am I unwilling to give up?
What story am I telling myself about why this can't change?
What would I have to face if this situation shifted?
Who would I be without this problem?
These questions often reveal uncomfortable truths. Maybe you're stuck in a unfulfilling job because leaving would mean admitting you made a mistake. Maybe you're stuck in your fitness journey because losing weight would mean losing your excuse for why other things in your life aren't working.
Step 3: Challenge the Hidden Belief
Every place you're stuck has a belief underneath it. Find it.
Listen to the language you use when you talk about your stuck area:
"I'm just not good at..."
"People like me don't..."
"I've always been..."
"In my family, we..."
"I could never..."
These statements point to your limiting beliefs. Once you've identified them, ask:
Is this belief actually true, or just familiar?
Where did this belief come from?
What is this belief costing me?
What would be possible if I didn't believe this anymore?
What would I need to believe instead?
Step 4: Make One Unconventional Move
Doing the same things will get you the same results. To get unstuck, you need to do something different—ideally something that makes you slightly uncomfortable.
This doesn't mean making a reckless decision. It means taking one action that breaks your usual pattern.
If you've been stuck in research mode, make a decision today. If you've been doing everything alone, ask someone for help. If you've been playing it safe, take one calculated risk. If you've been moving fast without reflection, take a week to pause and think.
The point is to interrupt the pattern. Stuckness thrives on repetition. Movement creates momentum.
Step 5: Create Structure and Accountability
Motivation alone won't get you unstuck. You need structure.
Set a specific, measurable goal with a deadline
Break it into the smallest possible next steps
Schedule those steps in your calendar like appointments
Tell someone what you're doing and ask them to check in
Track your progress visibly
The difference between a goal and a wish is a plan with accountability. Create both.
Step 6: Expect and Navigate Resistance
Here's what will happen once you start taking action: you'll encounter resistance.
You'll feel scared. You'll doubt yourself. You'll want to quit. You'll have setbacks. Your inner critic will get loud. Other people might question you or feel threatened by your changes.
This is all normal. Resistance isn't a sign you're on the wrong path—it's a sign you're on a path that matters.
The question isn't how to eliminate resistance. It's how to keep moving in the presence of it.
Develop a response plan:
When I feel like quitting, I will... (call my accountability partner, review my why, take a 10-minute walk)
When I doubt myself, I will... (read my past wins list, remind myself that discomfort isn't danger)
When I have a setback, I will... (give myself 24 hours to feel it, then recommit to the next step)
The Breakthrough Moment
Here's what I've observed in coaching sessions: breakthrough doesn't usually feel like an explosion. It feels like a shift.
One day, you realise you're no longer obsessing about the problem. You're taking action without the internal battle. You're trying things and learning from them rather than needing everything to be perfect. You're moving.
The energy that was locked up in being stuck becomes available for creation. And suddenly, the life that felt impossible starts to feel inevitable.
But here's the key: breakthrough doesn't happen to you. You create it through the deliberate choice to stop doing what isn't working and start doing what might.
When Stuck Is Actually a Gift
I want to offer you a different way to think about being stuck.
What if stuck isn't the enemy? What if it's actually a gift—an invitation to examine what isn't working and make a different choice?
Every plateau is a pause before transformation. Every period of stuckness is your life asking you: "Is this really what you want? Is this really who you are?"
The people who break through aren't the ones who never get stuck. They're the ones who get curious about their stuckness instead of ashamed of it. They're the ones who see it as information, not failure.
Your Unstuck Life Awaits
Right now, in this moment, you have everything you need to begin moving again.
Not to have it all figured out. Not to make the perfect choice. Not to have all the answers.
Just to take the next step.
You don't need more time. You don't need more confidence. You don't need more resources.
You need to decide that staying stuck is no longer acceptable. You need to get honest about your role in your stuckness. You need to take one uncomfortable action. And then another. And another.
The life you want is on the other side of the discomfort you're avoiding.
And here's the beautiful truth: you don't have to do this alone. Getting support—whether through coaching, therapy, mentorship, or community—isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign that you're serious about change.
If you're ready to move from stuck to unstuck, to break through the plateau that's been holding you back, I'd love to help. Because I've walked this path with so many people, and I've seen what's possible when someone decides they're done settling for stuck.
What's the one thing you're ready to stop tolerating?
That's your starting point. Begin there.
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